So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
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Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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