I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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