doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Vodka?
Forever.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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