Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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