sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize