whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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