he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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