So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
