Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize