so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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