I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
There's always time for handjobs
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS