Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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