these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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