Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Let's paint friendship bongs
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize