At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize