I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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