Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize