You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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