My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
it was like eating out sand paper
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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