Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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