I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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