Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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