Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
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I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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