I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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