I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
21 Millennials Confess The Most Awkward Way Someone Has Tried Hitting On Them
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I just found puke in my bra..
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.