please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize