Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey