Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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