im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
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