I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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