How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.