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• (810): View more from Michigan

  nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy

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• (909): View more from California

  I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.

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• (315): View more from New York

  My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (505): View more from New Mexico

  so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  why is my forehead so bruised?

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  i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (775): View more from Nevada

  I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"

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• (716): View more from New York

  I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess

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