Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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