This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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