i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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