Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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