is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize