Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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