He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.