I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct