True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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