I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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