The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
19 Teachers Share the Funniest Items Brought to “Show and Tell”
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.