As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
