so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize