Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Randomize
