your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize