Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
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Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
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