Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
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