I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize