Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
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The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
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Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Shame - the story of my life.
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